Friday, September 3, 2010

And Then Came Separation Anxiety...

Ohhhhh good old separation anxiety... you turn my happy independent baby into a blubbering mess when I leave the room, hand him off to grandma, give him to daddy, or even move to the side of the room where he can't see me.

Just when I got over my separation anxiety about going back to work, going away to teach a workshop for most of the day, or even book a cruise with my husband, my baby's anxiety kicks into overdrive. Part of me wonders if his anxiety growing is because mine is shrinking. Does he feel me pulling away?

I've read that he's finally realizing that when something goes out of view that its not gone forever. So when he can't see me he wants me back because he knows I'm not actually gone. He is also starting to develop preferences for people. One day he may prefer me and the next daddy. People tell me it goes in phases but its so sad to hear him cry when I leave the room to put on my makeup in the morning. But you can't calm the voices in my head telling me he knows I'm more comfortable leaving him. All I can do is give extra hugs and kisses before I leave and schedule more snuggle time at home.

On top of the separation anxiety he has also developed stranger anxiety. He used to smile and coo at anyone who held him. Now when I pass him off to someone "new" he cries of stiffens up! My social baby clams up and becomes a statue.

Its amazing to see not only the physical development of my baby but also the emotional. He has preferences, actual feelings, and shows his love in a smile or touch.